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Post by esty (archive) on Nov 11, 2013 18:14:09 GMT
I have The Lakes Lurgy coughing and sniffling and shivering. Youngest son still has an edge to him and eldest son who is completely sorted these days continues to be completely sorted. However on day of youngest son's trip I went to speak to his teacher to remind him about son being recently adopted and that he would likely to be going on the trip with different expectations and needs to the majority of the children going and that son would be really helped by making sure he did sleep and that he ate very regularly, etc. Teacher (male) 'oh he'll be fine! Oh he'll be fine'. Whilst brushing me off. What I'm wanting to know is what tactic to take at parent's evening on Wednesday. Should I ask him when he was adopted as he seems to know all about modern day adopted children or should I ask which university of patronizing he went too? I was really cross with his response and don't want to let it pass unchallenged really. So any suggestions of what tactic/attitude to take? He's the Deputy Head too.
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Post by Deleted on Nov 11, 2013 18:20:29 GMT
Have you got any articles on attachment you could take along to give to him to read. Give him two weeks and say you'll test him to see how much he took on board. Seriously have a look at the Resources Board and copy off any relevant links for him to look at. Sorry to hear you've got a lurgy
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Post by cowgirl on Nov 11, 2013 18:26:18 GMT
Could you ask how much experience he has had of adopted children ?
I had small problems with my bc & From year 1 onwards I'd always ask for a separate appointment rather than parents evening. I asked for a 30 mins slot. I was happy to meet whenever it suited them.
Parents evening is such rush.
Hope you feel better tomorrow
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Post by moo on Nov 11, 2013 18:28:07 GMT
Deffo Do as Jmk says & tell him to expect to be tested!!!
Mind you I also like your idea of asking him when he himself was infact adopted!!!
Shock tactics are needed methinks..... Letters to the head might help coz ofsted often get to see them!! Usually gets my lot heading for the hills!!
Good Luck He Sounds A Complete Twit.....
Hope the lurgy improves.....
Xx. moo. Xx
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Post by esty (archive) on Nov 11, 2013 18:36:14 GMT
The Head is even more useless. She gave son's birth name to the school DJ who knew his birth parents from when at another school. She was asked to say to DJ if you recognize any children please make sure you keep their names confidential. What she said was son's birthname don't tell anyone that you've seen him or words to that effect. So if he hadn't perhaps recognized him he certainly did afterwards. The school tends to patronize all parents and is very sure it's in it's rights on most things. I will probably go in with no expectations on wed and see what attitude is and them either go challenge or inform or challenge and inform. Thank you
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Post by bagpuss72 on Nov 11, 2013 19:21:11 GMT
Sorry to hear that you have come back with the dreaded lurgy, perhaps you should swap the cava from your weekend for a hot toddy tonight Good luck with school, teacher sounds just like the know all, actually know nothing numpties we deal with at DS's school all the time. Definately take some "light" reading on attachment into him (preferably enough to fill a wheel barrow) to help fill the gaps in his knowledge, and suggest you have a chat again when he has had a chance to peruse at his leisure of course. Our lads teacher is deputy head and senco, but not a clue about attachment &developmental trauma and has no desire to learn about it. I dread dealing with the most simplest interaction with school these days, must have tried every approach possible to no avail, so I really hope someone listens to you and takes it on board.
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Post by damson on Nov 13, 2013 16:54:09 GMT
We got the Adoption Support team to send a social worker into my AS's primary school at the start of year 6. First she came to talk to his class teacher and me, and then she did a lunchtime session in the staffroom with all the teachers and TAs. She had worked in education, so translated everything attachmenty into SEN speak which I could see getting through. She achieved what I simply could not. His last year at primary was transformed,he got the level 4s they wanted in KS2, and they managed his transition to secondary successfully. I suspect that schools have a view on parents 'fussing'. However,if ever the school needed a positive reminder that our children are not 'normal' or 'just naughty',the pupil premium plus of £1900 a year for children adopted from care, starts next April,and is paid straight to the school. That much money says a lot. Especially as they will have to account for how they spend it to narrow the gap for your boy! I think I'd ask how they plan to use the PPP for your little golden goose
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Post by justbserene11 on Nov 13, 2013 17:36:13 GMT
Well I would go the parents evening and take it from there, but.........write to the head/governors with your concerns/questions and ask about PPP. As it was pointed out in a previous thread, the governors/ head should write back and your letter will be kept on file (OFSTED).
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Post by esty (archive) on Nov 14, 2013 16:12:06 GMT
It's a bit of a blurred line as they are meeting his needs educationally and in fact he has gone from strength to strength academically having attended their provision of 1:1 clubs since he started there. The issue is with the emotional understanding of trauma and what it can and has done to him. The Education Authority are supposed to have spoken with Head today and I'm waiting to hear outcome of that before doing anything.
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