Post by mrsbear21 on Jul 18, 2023 9:03:16 GMT
Hi everyone! Everything has been going really well with Paddington. His anxiety settled down a lot after our celebration hearing, and we've been having a lovely peaceful and joyful home life for the last couple of months.
However yesterday an issue cropped up. There has been no big fallout yet. But I'm worried if I don't get a handle on it there could be down the line.
So Paddington has chosen the week before school finishes for summer to start telling his classmates that he has 2 sisters. The problem is 1 or 2 friends have been to our house for play dates, and have obviously not seen any sisters or evidence of any sisters there. This has led them to say that Paddington does not have any sisters and this is really upsetting him. He's not been acting out at all; instead he told me about it last night, and we had a good talk about how he does have wonderful sisters and it's just that they don't live with us and his friends don't know the whole picture. While that seemed to comfort him, it's also clear he's either unwilling or unable to explain to his classmates that he is adopted.
I don't get any impression that his friends are being mean or deliberately trying to make him sad. They are just being logical based on their own experiences.
I did explain it to his class teacher this morning. So she's aware of the issue and can help him if she overhears repeat conversations.
I'm not as worried about this last week of school as I am about how to tackle this next year.
Paddington has shown no signs of wanting to talk to anyone outside our family about being adopted. (And he never talks about birth mun and dad). But he loves and is very proud of his sisters, and talks about them all the time. I don't want to push him into anything he's not comfortable with/still processing; but I think repeated denial of him having sisters is really going to trouble him.
What do you guys think is the best way to tackle this with school for next year?
I think that Paddington is going to need me or the teachers to help explain things. He is often very happy for me to step in and help explain things; but I need to find the right balance so I don't say more than he is comfortable with
(I haven't spoken to school beyond this morning's word as yet. But I will raise it ahead of next year once I have my thoughts in order. So far they've proven super supportive and knowledgeable. I'm just processing my thoughts/worry ahead of speaking to them.)
However yesterday an issue cropped up. There has been no big fallout yet. But I'm worried if I don't get a handle on it there could be down the line.
So Paddington has chosen the week before school finishes for summer to start telling his classmates that he has 2 sisters. The problem is 1 or 2 friends have been to our house for play dates, and have obviously not seen any sisters or evidence of any sisters there. This has led them to say that Paddington does not have any sisters and this is really upsetting him. He's not been acting out at all; instead he told me about it last night, and we had a good talk about how he does have wonderful sisters and it's just that they don't live with us and his friends don't know the whole picture. While that seemed to comfort him, it's also clear he's either unwilling or unable to explain to his classmates that he is adopted.
I don't get any impression that his friends are being mean or deliberately trying to make him sad. They are just being logical based on their own experiences.
I did explain it to his class teacher this morning. So she's aware of the issue and can help him if she overhears repeat conversations.
I'm not as worried about this last week of school as I am about how to tackle this next year.
Paddington has shown no signs of wanting to talk to anyone outside our family about being adopted. (And he never talks about birth mun and dad). But he loves and is very proud of his sisters, and talks about them all the time. I don't want to push him into anything he's not comfortable with/still processing; but I think repeated denial of him having sisters is really going to trouble him.
What do you guys think is the best way to tackle this with school for next year?
I think that Paddington is going to need me or the teachers to help explain things. He is often very happy for me to step in and help explain things; but I need to find the right balance so I don't say more than he is comfortable with
(I haven't spoken to school beyond this morning's word as yet. But I will raise it ahead of next year once I have my thoughts in order. So far they've proven super supportive and knowledgeable. I'm just processing my thoughts/worry ahead of speaking to them.)