Post by sockthing on Feb 11, 2016 10:09:36 GMT
Long post warning!!!!! Sorry!!!
I feel at a bit of a loss with school. I can't seem to get them to take me seriously and I feel like they are just humouring me and I'm a bit of a nuisance. They are giving me the impression they think everything is hunky-dory but Kipper Is clearly (to me) struggling in an ongoing low-level way. He has had group sessions for social skills - specifically turn taking in conversation, fine motor skills, and some vague 1:1 sessions to address anxiety with the Learning Mentor. He has access to the quiet area when he gets sensory overload.
He has been like pushing sand up a waterfall - just totally tuned out of what we are saying and unable to engage, and being very inflexible and persevering so I cannot divert him from whatever tack he is taking. I do not feel at all clear about how he presents at school - if I say these things to them in an informal context they nod and agree, but at other times if I try and get their opinion on how he presents the teachers tend to be hard to pin down, quite low-key and casual about any little traits or quirks , but I recognise them as signs of stress. He is slightly behind academically. I think he struggles to follow what is said especially when it is addressed to the group; for example 3 times now he has had rewards of some kind but seemed not to know how he had earned them. What else is he missing!!! but they tell me his listening has improved (I think this just means he has stopped interrupting, which is not the same)
I asked for an informal meeting with the teachers so that I can chat over a few minor concerns but no one got back to me. Then while I was waiting to hear from them they suddenly produced a draft IEP, on which mysteriously every concern seems to have been resolved except his handwriting. Not all the support they already give him is documented on there and I would prefer to have it evidenced even if it is ongoing and effective. For example, I've noticed in his reading log that a TA reads 1:1 with him every day.: reading is what he is most behind with but they haven't mentioned any of this on the IEP. It says on the IEP that "Kippers anxiety at school is reduced and he knows how to employ the strategies taught" For evidence of social skills improving they intend to take photos and a video of him in conversation!!?? I do not believe everything is resolved and hunky-dory in the way presented.
They have a home/school communication book but they don't read it every day so I often feel like I am writing to thin air, they rarely write in it of their own accord and don't always reply to what I have said. He got " upset" during P.E about taking turns which is very unlike him because he normally holds all his feelings and stress in at school. The teacher told me this in the playground at pick-up time at which point Kipper got upset and put his hands over his ears and ran through the school gates. When I said to her I'd rather it went in the book she kept saying "but I wasn't in his class today" as though I should just be grateful she told me at all - which I am but I don't understand why it is SOO hard to have a system regularly checking the book and jotting 2 lines in there. I still don't know whether "upset" means he was crying or angry or both, and what was said to him to resolve it.
I don't really know how to address all of this. Do I just raise it all in the IEP meeting? Unfortunately the IEP meeting won't be for two or three weeks at least and in the meantime I feel I am left working blind and worrying about my little boy who is not happy. Sometimes I wish he would just have meltdowns because at least then it would make them sit up and take notice!!
Sorry for the long rant but I would appreciate any thoughts as I don't know how far I am being unrealistic.
I feel at a bit of a loss with school. I can't seem to get them to take me seriously and I feel like they are just humouring me and I'm a bit of a nuisance. They are giving me the impression they think everything is hunky-dory but Kipper Is clearly (to me) struggling in an ongoing low-level way. He has had group sessions for social skills - specifically turn taking in conversation, fine motor skills, and some vague 1:1 sessions to address anxiety with the Learning Mentor. He has access to the quiet area when he gets sensory overload.
He has been like pushing sand up a waterfall - just totally tuned out of what we are saying and unable to engage, and being very inflexible and persevering so I cannot divert him from whatever tack he is taking. I do not feel at all clear about how he presents at school - if I say these things to them in an informal context they nod and agree, but at other times if I try and get their opinion on how he presents the teachers tend to be hard to pin down, quite low-key and casual about any little traits or quirks , but I recognise them as signs of stress. He is slightly behind academically. I think he struggles to follow what is said especially when it is addressed to the group; for example 3 times now he has had rewards of some kind but seemed not to know how he had earned them. What else is he missing!!! but they tell me his listening has improved (I think this just means he has stopped interrupting, which is not the same)
I asked for an informal meeting with the teachers so that I can chat over a few minor concerns but no one got back to me. Then while I was waiting to hear from them they suddenly produced a draft IEP, on which mysteriously every concern seems to have been resolved except his handwriting. Not all the support they already give him is documented on there and I would prefer to have it evidenced even if it is ongoing and effective. For example, I've noticed in his reading log that a TA reads 1:1 with him every day.: reading is what he is most behind with but they haven't mentioned any of this on the IEP. It says on the IEP that "Kippers anxiety at school is reduced and he knows how to employ the strategies taught" For evidence of social skills improving they intend to take photos and a video of him in conversation!!?? I do not believe everything is resolved and hunky-dory in the way presented.
They have a home/school communication book but they don't read it every day so I often feel like I am writing to thin air, they rarely write in it of their own accord and don't always reply to what I have said. He got " upset" during P.E about taking turns which is very unlike him because he normally holds all his feelings and stress in at school. The teacher told me this in the playground at pick-up time at which point Kipper got upset and put his hands over his ears and ran through the school gates. When I said to her I'd rather it went in the book she kept saying "but I wasn't in his class today" as though I should just be grateful she told me at all - which I am but I don't understand why it is SOO hard to have a system regularly checking the book and jotting 2 lines in there. I still don't know whether "upset" means he was crying or angry or both, and what was said to him to resolve it.
I don't really know how to address all of this. Do I just raise it all in the IEP meeting? Unfortunately the IEP meeting won't be for two or three weeks at least and in the meantime I feel I am left working blind and worrying about my little boy who is not happy. Sometimes I wish he would just have meltdowns because at least then it would make them sit up and take notice!!
Sorry for the long rant but I would appreciate any thoughts as I don't know how far I am being unrealistic.
