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Post by chotimonkey on May 5, 2014 18:49:16 GMT
Squirrel was lying on the floor flipping through her folder, telling the story... I came in at "That's bm and bd, they made me but they didn't know how to look after baby squirrel and look that's FC house where I went to live, and that's all members of ff and that's my chair/ bear/ bowl etc and that's the people who were talking about me and ... Turn the page... Gasp of pure joy... That's my mummy and daddy, kisses our picture... I'm so happy... More kisses before moving on to the rest of our extended family Ok there's a lot of work to be done on the finer details as she gets older... But I'm enjoying her current interpretation.
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Post by chotimonkey on May 5, 2014 18:51:58 GMT
It's a fairly extreme approach but I think adopting george has really made squirrel understand her own adoption... Esp what babies need to keep them safe and help them grow and moving from FC to us... Maybe it's an argument to use im with dh in a year or two for number 4
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Deleted
Deleted Member
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Post by Deleted on May 5, 2014 19:34:23 GMT
You're a hopeless case Choti (poor DH better start saving). Love Squirrels understanding though, really good for her age.
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Post by moo on May 6, 2014 16:42:45 GMT
Lovely choti....
Think that daddy monkey needs to be a focused determined sort of a chap?!?
Hee Hee Hee
xx. moo. Xx
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squeak
Bronze Member
Married Adopter
Posts: 73
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Post by squeak on May 7, 2014 18:43:14 GMT
Wow!! Well done choti, mr monkey and squirrel!
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Post by chotimonkey on May 7, 2014 20:20:57 GMT
I'm not sure how much she has internalised but she loves book and stories and will spend hours poring over picture books and re-enacting the story, she knows it is her story, but is currently most interested in pics of her as a baby and all her baby stuff... I think she likes seeing evidence that she was like curious george and had all the things babies have
I have referred to bps by their first names and have said they are who made you but didn't know how to keep babies safe
Do oeople think that's ok... I use the term birth mother, but there is something about the phrase tummy mummy that seems to cutesy for what it is...
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Post by chotimonkey on May 7, 2014 20:22:55 GMT
And I'm tongue in cheek... I think mr monkey us immovable on the issue of another...
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squeak
Bronze Member
Married Adopter
Posts: 73
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Post by squeak on May 7, 2014 20:26:48 GMT
I'm with you on tummy mummy - don't like it, very confusing! First names here, and that's whose tummy you grew in...
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Post by justbserene11 on May 8, 2014 11:16:33 GMT
Yep, me too. I use BM first name and refer to her as birth mother. Personally, I think it helps differentiate what her role was and what my role as 'mummy' is . At the moment I have bought in life story work by reading her stories and also by saying, 'when daddy and I first met you-you wore the same colour top as daddy' and then I would show her the photograph that was taken during intros.
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Post by moo on May 8, 2014 11:35:42 GMT
Aww good one bserene11....
I always say mummeees tummy wouldn't work she couldn't grow a baby..... So xx had to do it for mummeee..... So far to my amazement they havn't spontaneously asked why xx didn't keep them.... I have always told them however that she couldn't keep boys safe & look after them ( even when she went for training to try to learn how ) I am always astounded how well they take it in.... They seem to understand but they do sometimes ask Q's.......I deeply hope that they ask more & more now as they are getting older ( baa sadly still v.v. immature )
xx. moo. Xx
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