goat
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Post by goat on Jan 13, 2014 19:07:24 GMT
Wel, today was the big day. Meeting The Kid.
I am not too sure how much I will get done if this, but I will try my best.
We had our meetings etc this morning and then headed over to FC home. The Kid had decided to play a trick on us, which we had been told by FC. He was hiding , and FC told us he had gone to Wales!
We found him under the table giggling. He popped out and gave us a big hug , laughing and calling us Mummy and Daddy
It was surreal, but very natural. We gave him a a Power Ranger toy he has seen in the DVD we made. He was really happy with it and we played a game on the TV of pairs ( he was actually brilliant at it! )
Then we had a drink, which he spooned to Power Ranger. As we sat there, he asked me where people come from! ( yep ... Birds and the bees after 20 mins), but with the FC laughing her head off at my stammering answer, I sort of got through , ( I think I said from Mummy's and Daddy's, that make little babies that grow into ' people')
Phew, he seemed ok with that for now... I was happy when he wanted to show us his room, and toys.
He then made up a lovely game where we closed our eyes and one of us got a teddy. He was really careful to make sure we all got chosen and loved being chosen himself.
He was do happy being picked up, hugged etc, and even asked to go on my shoulders.
Then, he wanted a poo, and wanted me to take him. He giggled at the noises the was creating, I was just trying not to pass out at the gas issue! Then he called Mummy in and we sat there in the bathroom chatting in the thick air.
After the Poo, we sat in his room, and he suddenly put his DVD on pause, and told us he needed to pop down to see his FC. We learnt later he came down and told her he loved her ( bless)
Then we got sent up and down stairs on various missions and eventually , as time was coming to an end we payed with his DS.
We had overstayed by about half an hour, and he asked when we were going ( haha) then he went to his FC and got emotional , telling her he loved her. We just waited for him to settle with her, and started to prepare to leave. He then came over and took a ' selfie' of all three of us and gave us a big hug each.
We left our slippers ( that FC had bought us!!) in the hall and told him we would be back tomorrow.
He waved and ran down the road as I beeped the horn.
That was only a couple of hours and we are knackered !
We are really blessed with a wonderful, caring, thoughtful FC who has prepared The Kid well.
Onwards to day two. Phew. !!
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Post by happyone on Jan 13, 2014 19:28:10 GMT
This is beautiful can I ask how old xxxxx so exciting remember the general advice rest and eat well xx
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goat
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Post by goat on Jan 13, 2014 19:55:53 GMT
Hi, The Kid is 5.5 years old
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Post by lilka on Jan 13, 2014 20:26:46 GMT
Wonderful Great that the FC has done such a fab job Hope things continue to go really well!
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Post by nomoretears on Jan 13, 2014 20:46:36 GMT
Excellent! This has made me laugh so much, I love it!
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Post by leo on Jan 13, 2014 21:03:47 GMT
What a lovely start. Congratulations - and lots of early nights for you this week!
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Post by moo on Jan 14, 2014 9:13:07 GMT
Oh goat this is great.... So exciting...
What a bright little lad you have there.... Loads of Q's & interaction... Quite right he sounds wonderfully prepared....
Birds & bees on day 1 now that really is a first!!! Well done don't think I would have managed so well!!!
Can't wait for day 2....
Congratulations!!.,!! Daddy....
Xx. moo. Xx
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goat
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Post by goat on Jan 14, 2014 17:40:49 GMT
Cheers Everyone.
Day Two
We turned up to find a very happy Kid, big hugs for us both
We went straight out to a little park at the end of the road with a football. Again, involving Mummy and Daddy. FC stayed behind. After 25 mins we headed home. Then a series of toys and games, followed by drawing us.
He took time to look at the colour of our eyes and skin(!) and they were lovely. We then went back to the park and played with the football again. He loves opening the car doors and using the remote to open the boot. He looked at his new car seat, and tried it for comfort.
FC made a lovely lunch , and he really relaxed, chatting with us all, and after cutting up all our cakes Into 10 pieces each he laid on my lap , like a baby , giggling and I fed him a little piece. That was amazing bonding for us.
Then we watched a DVD with Mummy helping and it was time to go.
After lunch he tidied up with FC and stacked the plates and put cling film on the left overs. He's so good! ( showing me up!)
Today when it was time to go , I think he had had enough. He still gave us big hugs, but then just said " see you later guys" and didn't come out to wave.
Overall it was a brilliant day , and Mummy Goat was over the moon when he asked if she would bath him every night. That's Mummy's thing she can't wait to do.
Thankfully no more questions on Biology today, and no poo!
Thanks for your kind thoughts and I will try to keep this going if I can as he days get longer.
The Goat. X
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Post by happyone on Jan 14, 2014 18:22:14 GMT
Beautiful xxxxx
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Post by Deleted on Jan 14, 2014 18:30:56 GMT
Oh wow Goat - How did I miss day one! He sounds FAB!! Really can't believe you were thrown into the birds and bee's on day one and poo's too - You really are a Dad now!!!! What a star helping out round the house with the tidying up. FC has trained him well and I looooove the fact that she provided yourself and Mummy Goat with slippers. That is such a nice touch, never heard of that one before, but how great that your kid could see that you were both coming back. You will have to change his name from "the Kid" to "Our kid" now he is yours. Can't wait to hear more.
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goat
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Post by goat on Jan 14, 2014 18:31:11 GMT
I also had to be' Daddy Donkey' which played havoc with my knees!
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goat
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Post by goat on Jan 14, 2014 18:33:49 GMT
Thanks JMK, indeed, he has been amazing.
The Our Kid suits him as he's a proper Northerner and we're Southern Softies!
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Post by moo on Jan 15, 2014 6:05:28 GMT
Ahhh goat wonderful day two....
Being donkey is a killer... Flat knees & sore back.... Take it easy us donkeys need a slow break in time.... I was near doubled up for days!!! Wow your boy seems a great multi taser... Brilliant for a boy so young!! Bet football alone was a joy... You are doing well & he seems so relaxed.... hope mummy is a good footballer ...
Yep you will start to tire it really is astonishingly exhausting hope you get time for a few lines.... Us oldies just love intro diaries.... Lovin yours Thanx for posting....
Xx. moo. Xx
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goat
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Post by goat on Jan 15, 2014 19:21:25 GMT
Hi All, and thanks for the kind comments.
Day Three
Really magical with Our Kid
Day started 10am with DVDs in the room, and his lovely game where he gives the teddy out with our eyes closed, plenty of mummy cuddles and he now looks to her to do wiping faces and comforting.
Trips to the park x2. He was receptive to being told 'no ' when he wanted to drive his Monster truck down the road, and was happy for me to carry it to the park.
He was happy all day and we played so many different games. He has the concentration of a knat most of the time, but then gets into something and settles for a bit. The loves putting DVDs on, but never really watches any of them, he just changes them. We now know the beginning of Scoobie Doo movie VERY well.
In the street he holds our hands, and asks before running off into the park.
We took FC to pub for lunch, he loved it, doing the ordering, chatting, toilet for a wee, ordering pudding etc. he never budged.
Then home for more beginnings of films, including the introduction of 3d movies. ( they look good) ' Put your glasses on Daddy and Mummy, now take them off, etc. '
Towards the end, he turned to me and said ' I love you Daddy' just out of the blue, and was like a dream end to the best day we could hope for.
He's a really GOOD kid. We are so lucky.
Long day tomorrow. Thank god for ready meals.
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Post by moo on Jan 16, 2014 3:29:22 GMT
Oohh great day daddy.... All is going soo well.... Love your description of DVD starting of so many great 'kid' films..... Well who can blame a boy when he has his new daddy & mummy to share & show all his 'stuff' to!!!
Such a joy to read you all sound so happy & wow what a perfect match.....
Pace yourself for the long day.....
Can't wait for more....
Xx. moo. Xx
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goat
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Post by goat on Jan 16, 2014 21:14:27 GMT
Day Four
Knackered.
Well, we had a lovely greeting when we turned up at 6.45am. We were saying hello to FC, who was already up, when a little Kid, in a lion Onesie came in huffing that he had been hiding under his bed wAiting for us.
We had a quite peaceful morning of phones, DVDs, park etc after breakfast. He helps do breakfast and tidies up after (!).
In the park he was silly, and used some swear words, and generally wasn't coping. I think we both dreaded he might be ' on the turn', but he was so good later. Firstly he came to us when he hurt his knee and got six magic kisses in the park.
In the afternoon we went to soft play ( my new favourite place on earth), where he made some mates. We followed him round for a bit until we realised he was a softie, and complete charmer with adults and kids alike.
He got upset when he wasn't allowed to have fish fingers at soft play , but luckily his Iron Man Tattoo was in the pipeline, and made up for it.
Back at FC, we had tea with FC adopted kids, who sang an Adele song to us, perfectly, just to make sure we were completely emotionally knackered in. It was very moving to be there, a very special moment.
Hugs followed and instructions in how to enter The Kids room in the morning (apparently we don't have time for talking to FC, just come and look under the bed).
Off to holiday cottage for You've Been Framed, which we have watched every night, and I highly recommend. And Gin.
X
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Post by Deleted on Jan 17, 2014 7:23:20 GMT
Thanks for all the updates Goat, it's great hearing about intro's from a male perspective - Think you are our first Dad to do this! "Being silly and using swear words in the park" - Sounds like he is really processing what is about to happen to him and is naturally a bit worried which will be causing him loads of anxiety. He is old enough to understand what is happening and is probably terrified at the thought of moving away from his beloved FC. Although he knows why, he will be full of mixed emotions, thrilled at having his own new Mum and Dad, but petrified at the thought of leaving his FC, his home, his friends, his school ..... everything he knows and is familiar to him. No wonder he is having wobbles and swearing, I think I would too if I were him. Lots of re-assurance and empathy needed, just saying you know how hard this is for him, but that things will get easier with time, that he can phone FC when he wants to, that you will still be in touch etc.. These are the things he needs to hear over and over to let him know that you care and understand that change is not easy for anyone. The more you can alleviate his fears the better he will cope. You are doing just fine, but do expect unpredictable behaviour as he processes it all in his little head. I love the way you used distraction techniques when he got upset about not having fish fingers - Well done you!! Am filling up at the Adele recital - pass the tissues. Intro's are so emotional aren't they? But sounds like your Kid has had a lot of love and affection from his FFamily and that is FAB and will stand him well in the future. We all know some FC's are better than others, but your Kid sounds like he has had a FAB one. Hope you find him under his bed this morning, might take a while as he sounds like a real jokester - perhaps we'll see him on "You've been framed" in the future!
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Post by moo on Jan 17, 2014 11:19:24 GMT
Lovely lovely lovely....
Just lovin' your intro diary goat.... You sound such a perfect match...
Soft play really is just the best.... Lots of interaction opportunities & eye contact.... Magic,.. I too loved the tattoo diversion .... Genius .....
No bumping heads under that bed now!!!
Xx. moo. Xx
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Post by knight on Jan 17, 2014 20:12:00 GMT
Oh no, how did I miss these Goat ~ things sound like they're going really well though can't believe your 1st "first" was "the talk", heck. wonderful, hope today's been good too
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goat
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Post by goat on Jan 17, 2014 22:13:23 GMT
JMK and Knight, thank you for your kind words
You have summed him up well, he needs to know what we are doing, and keep repeating the plan of the day, it really helps.
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goat
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Post by goat on Jan 17, 2014 22:36:57 GMT
Day Five
Probably
Ok. So up at 5.30. Arrived at FC and followed The Kids instructions to find him in his bed. When we got up there he was giggling under his sheet. He had set a trap ( rolled up rug) and was disappointed we had not been thwarted my the 1" high barrier. FC told us last night he told her he was happy. " you said you would find me the best Mummy and Daddy in the world and you did". Sorry all other Mummies and Daddies!
He had great Mummy time in the morning , getting dressed, explaining DVD goodies and baddies, angry birds etc. I dreamed of falling asleep.
After breakfast ( prepared by him- mine filled the bowl to the top, and I hate cereal!), we headed to our Holiday cottage. He was totally fine when FC left and painted and played play dough.
Then out for lunch and he proudly told the waitress that this was his Mummy and Daddy. He got a signed card from them, which he kept in his new Moshi Monsters Wallet.
Back to the cottage for Lego building. Some tears when we stopped him packing all the Lego to take back. What was really great was he was sad, but came for a cuddle, and agreed to leave the Lego. ( we let him take a little motorbike) his attention has been great today, and when we were building his Lego we has a cuddle and he told me he loved me. Sweet!
Back to FC, onto review meeting... ( all very happy.... looking at Weds to head home). Then back to FC for bedtime story.
He was lovely. We both read a story and he made us tuck him in with the teddy we had sent him. He then made us kiss his feet, then his nose and then his eyes.
Now, gin.
A magical day with our Boy.
X
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Post by knight on Jan 18, 2014 0:02:08 GMT
FC told us last night he told her he was happy. " you said you would find me the best Mummy and Daddy in the world and you did". ohhhh stop, that's just too sweet. Kids so know how to press the buttons on the cute-o-meter !!!!! I knows it's still early days but for him to be able to put that into words and tell his FC is great and hopefully bodes very well for the future.
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Post by moo on Jan 18, 2014 5:01:09 GMT
Oohh goat superb.....
You must be so tired.... It must be dire not to be able to re-group & relax at home.... Hope the holiday cottage is comfy....
Keep it comin' lovin the growing bond between you & the kid....
Wednesday will be here soon enough now.....
Xx. moo. X
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Post by Deleted on Jan 18, 2014 8:22:48 GMT
OMG He has you wrapped round his little finger already Goat!! You sound like you are in love and I'm not surprised, he sounds adorable a right little character. Think you are going to enjoy being off work and spending time with your little man. He sounds like he has been prepared well and the fact that he is already showing some anxiety about the move is a really good sign. Although having to watch him be upset is upsetting, it really is good that he is showing these feelings and is articulating his worries, because if he wasn't and was happy to go off with effectively strangers, without a backwards glance then that would have me worried for his/your future.
Not long now until wednesday, when you new life begins. I'm sure your FC will already have discussed moving day with you. If you've read the posts on here you will see it's best to just call to FC's home, don't stay for coffee or anything, keep it short and sweet and everyone will try and hold it together for your Kid's sake. Tears can be done later, but hanging around and delaying drinking tea etc is the worst possible thing to do. I'm sure you already know this, also don't forget to send the FC a text/email/phonecall after your Kid' first night. She will be as anxious as you.... Sorry I've gone into nagging mode.
Enjoy the next few days.
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goat
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Post by goat on Jan 18, 2014 12:07:12 GMT
No! Not nagging, it's great to hear advice. We were thinking of stopping for tea, so it's good to hear it's not great. His wonderful FC is going to find it hard, and I hope we can all keep it together. It's great that she is really supportive if us , and really wants future contact as much as possible , although we are mindful if the fact that she will soon have another child to focus on.
Anyway, got to dash, I am playing ' Ponokoly'. The five hour property game that is perfect for The Kid. I reckon we will get once round the board.
Bye for now.
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goat
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Post by goat on Jan 18, 2014 21:28:35 GMT
JMK, following chat with FC we are going to have our final moments and pack the car on Tuesday night. Weds we will literally say goodbye and off we go. FC agreed it was a good plan.
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goat
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Post by goat on Jan 18, 2014 22:09:08 GMT
Day Six
Picked The Kid up at 10. Back to the cottage. Games, lunch Wslk and Park.
Today we had plenty of getting the taking control from him, and he coped really well. Everything is Poo, Bums, Stinky
We told him that Mummies and Daddies decide what happens, which you could tell he processed. He then told us he was the boss, but didn't show distress when we did set the rules.
He managed a bit more concentrating on tasks, and even though he flits a lot, he is using screens less with us. He thrives on spending time with us, but we are aware he may find my phone more captivating than me in time
At our cottage he helped with the horses, and ran around like a loony.
We had a picnic inside on the rug which went great. ( he loves food!)
At the park he made a friend and we all played football. He shared well, and laughed loads. At the end he asked his friend for a hug. Too Sweet!
He helped make tea, and loved his pasta.
Then it was time for Mrs Goat to bath Our Kid. That was what I have waited 2 years to see. ( well, 10 really). He had bubble beards each, and he laughed and played until the water went cold. Proper lump in the throat stuff.
He went to bed - sort of- and was too tired for his book.
We are so tired but feel so happy to have our son with us
I hope it's not too rambling , but I will catch up tomorrow.
Thanks for all the kind thoughts. X
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Post by knight on Jan 18, 2014 22:37:57 GMT
Not too rambling at all Goat, absolutely lovely. You sound to be a very proud, loving and understanding Daddy. He sounds to be responding very well to both of you, so Wednesday ~ bring it on ??!!
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goat
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Post by goat on Jan 18, 2014 23:49:39 GMT
Yep, can't wait to get home now. He's talking quite a lot about it, and asking how many more days.
We have decided not to give him the number of 'sleeps' until Monday, just to check we are all agreed he is happy.
Off on a longer drive tomorrow as it's about 5 hrs + home. At the moment we get asked if we are nearly there on a 5 minute journey. Hahaha.
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Post by moo on Jan 19, 2014 7:47:41 GMT
Oh goat Thanx so much for sharing your thoughts & days events.... It is such a joy to read & you are all clearly so perfect for each other!
Lovin the bums & poo... As Toko says its 'the law ' esp with boys mine are exac the same!!!
Are we nearly there yet.... Know that one so well!! Hope you can stop off at some memorable locations to help fix the specialness of the journey to the kids new forever home.... So excited for you.... Well done mummy with the long awaited bath & beard play.... Fair brought a tear to my eye.....
Perfect plan for handover day & home trip it is best to leave fast as very emotional all around....
Can't wait for tomorrows instalment...
Xx. moo. Xx
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