Lapwing returned at 3.30 in the morning yesterday. Later this morning I found out she had some kind of sexual encounter with one of the boys she was with, barely knows and is known to the police. So I said she could not go out today; she was tired, I was tired and I don't want her to end up pregnant or raped.
She told me to F off, ran downstairs to put on her trainers, when I tried to stop her, she hit me round the head with a trainer, I grabbed her hoodie to stop her, she kicked me in the stomach. I let go of the hoodie and she ran into the front room, I followed, she picked up a glass and I could see she was ready to hit me. I opened the front door and told her to 'just go' she did, with glass still in hand, stopped turned and hurled it at my head. I shut the door and it caught the blow of the glass, shattering it.
I was in total shock, shaking and called 999. Explained the situation. Peewit arrived home from school 5 minutes later and was utterly distraught to see me crying and then to learn what his sister had done.
Anyway...police came round, Lapwing still missing, social services have done nothing, and say they will send someone round to chat to me.
What on earth can we do. How can I get Lapwing removed. She is a risk to herself and the rest of us. I have sent so many emails.
How can I force section 20?
Can we disrupt?
I cant see Peewit destroyed by all this.
Mum to DD Lapwing (13) & DS Peewit (12) Married to Mr Mudlark
All I can think of on a practical level is to phone the Adoption Legal Centre (0843 8866386) for advice or even the therapist you have been in touch with. Maybe they will know what will trigger a FC placement.
If not, do you have a police liaison involved? I have heard people in the past say the police have been much more helpful than SS.
Is there anyone you know who would take Lapwing in even for a few days to give you all a bit of a break and allow you time to make decisions? I realise her behaviour may make this impossible, just trying to think of a way for you to have some safety and head space.
Thinking of you and wishing you safety, strength and someone/some agency who will listen, act and find a solution. Please take care.
I’m so sorry. I wish I had some concrete advice to give you.
snooz attacked me last year and I had him arrested. I didn’t want him back in the house as I felt very unsafe and had needed a trip to A&E. the police held him overnight but ss insisted he came home the next day.
what they did do though was place 2 trained carers in my home 24 hours a day for 7 days (this could have continued had things not settled). I didn’t particularly think I’d like that option but in reality it worked really well.
however, this was the one and only incident of violence from Snooz.
all I can offer is for you to not get into any confrontations with her, at all. If she goes out, let her go and call the police or ss or anyone you feel needs to know you cannot keep her safe. She’s not going to listen or abide by your rules and enforcing them will only put you in danger.
I guess you could just say, the doors will be locked by a certain time and it’s up to her.
it’s so very scary, I’m so sorry you’ve had to experience this xx
Mum to Snooz, a quirky but fab 17 year old with ASD and Tourettes.
Sorry I'll respond properly later. Try and get the police to remove her, I have mentioned on a previous post they suggested thus to us as a last option, if SS did not do their job.
In theory they can do this under the same section they use when removing children from violent parents. I can't remember the section off hand but scroll through my old posts, I may have mentioned then?
Get them on-board, explain they need to do this to protect all of you and her and force SS hand.
I'm so sorry, it is so scary when they attack you like this and so damaging for siblings. Hugs, I hope you can get this sorted ASAP. xxx
Married to Bumblebear, 3 1/2 kids, a mix of adopted and home-made.