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Post by mrsbear21 on Jun 15, 2022 22:59:36 GMT
So Paddington was told about us today and given his book and transition toys.
We had the most amazing set of photos from his foster mum and then video clips! Only came through at 22:45 so we have no idea how we're going to get to sleep now.
Super emotional for both me & Mr Bear. I realised watching the clips, it was the first time we'd heard him speak.
Big grins from Paddington in every photo/clip, very excited by our garden and the toys got huge hugs.
We meet him for the first time on Saturday. No idea how to stay patient until then. Luckily my Mum is coming tomorrow for a quick visit before Paddington moves in so that will be a big help.
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Post by leo on Jun 16, 2022 8:42:12 GMT
Congratulations! Savour those wonderful feelings and enjoy your Mum's visit.
So pleased Paddington received the initial news well. Perhaps his sister already being placed has given him a little understanding of what is about to happen.
It's hard to sleep I know but try to fit in times for rest and relaxation where you can this week.
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Post by moo on Jun 16, 2022 9:22:56 GMT
Great News Mrs B.... Been Thinking Of You lots this week just knew it had to be soon 💙
Such an amazing time.... Great planning BTW that your mum is visiting for the last time as Mum!?! (My mum has been Nannie to me & all since the boys first day!! ) 💜 Enjoy the day go somewhere swanky for lunch perhaps xxx
I still have amazing vivid memories of the first visit with baa & skweek.... Never has faded so very special memories xxx
Enjoy....
Please consider writing an intro's diary.... Wonderful for us oldies reliving it all again... great for adopters to keep as a diary to share with children in years to come or just read as the weeks fly by xxxx
Sending many hugs xxxxx Enjoy xxx
Xx moo xxx
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Post by leo on Jun 17, 2022 10:57:54 GMT
Didn't we many years ago have an introductions thread?
Oooohhh Yessssss 💙
Xx moo 🐮
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Post by serrakunda on Jun 17, 2022 12:52:38 GMT
ooh so exciting , hope all goes well tomorrow
enjoy your last day of freedom !!
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Post by gilreth on Jun 17, 2022 21:02:57 GMT
Exciting times - enjoy your Introductions.
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Post by mrsbear21 on Jun 17, 2022 21:15:12 GMT
Thanks guys. Just back from a nice meal out. And diary has been bought and started 😊
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Post by mrsbear21 on Jun 18, 2022 14:46:11 GMT
So first meeting with Paddington went beautifully. He was a little bit shy at first, but foster mum quickly got us doing big floor jigsaw puzzels and it just flowed from there. He and Mr Bear had a great time on the trampoline and he loved Mr Bear's beard. Couldn't have gone any better and felt so natural.😁
Foster mum also mentioned in passing that he dressed as Paddington for World Book Day this year.... 😊
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Post by moo on Jun 18, 2022 17:20:09 GMT
Wonderful Mrs B xxx Sounds Brilliant xx
Amazing Fancy Dress For WBD?! Xx
Keep It Coming xx
Xx moo 🐮
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Post by leo on Jun 18, 2022 19:59:22 GMT
Obviously meant to be. What a coincidence!
So glad you have had a positive first meeting.
How long are your intros? Remember to pace yourselves and get as much rest as you can.
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Post by mudlark on Jun 18, 2022 23:55:27 GMT
Just catching up on this thread! Wonderful to read! Congratulations!
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Post by mrsbear21 on Jun 19, 2022 8:27:46 GMT
So move in day is not currently until 15 July. They want to take things very gently. We only live 40mins away from foster mum so we also have the benefit for being able to do introductions from home.
And of course you're spot on with the rest thing. Even though yesterday went so well, I've woken up (having slept pretty deeply) just feeling a bit drained. It's so peculiar how everyone tells you, but experiencing is another level. Thankfully we have taken on the advice and have virtually nothing to do today.
Next week is my last week in work and they've been brilliant so I really am down to a few admin tasks. That will also be odd because I've been there for 11 years and never taken more than 2 weeks off. But I'm so looking forward to one on one time with Paddington and fully plan on taking all my mat leave, even though he'll be going to school from September.
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Post by leo on Jun 21, 2022 10:50:32 GMT
You must be feeling in the middle of a strange limbo bubble with finishing work but not yet having Paddington home. Are you hoping to return to work after adoption leave? (And yes, definitely take all you are able to!)
Have you already got a school lined up for September or is that still in the planning stage?
I hope any visits you have this week go as well as your first one. It's a strange and unnatural time for everyone - so much change, so much emotion invested from all sides, so many unknowns. It can all become overwhelming for any of the people involved so keep those rest and relaxation times on your high priority list!
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Post by mrsbear21 on Jun 24, 2022 17:57:26 GMT
Thanks Leo!
I do indeed feel very strange this week. I officially finished work today and I'm quite down about it. That will pass but I've been there constantly for 11 years now (other than the usual holidays) and just at the moment I'm thinking of all the friends I'm not going to see everyday. I do hope to go back; but that is very dependent on what Paddington needs and how the next year goes.
On the upside this week's meetings with Paddington have continued to go well. It is perhaps more obvipus now how artificial it is. But he seems to be responding well and it's not feeling hard for us to create a bond with him. We're seeing hom both days this weekend, so looking forward to that.
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Post by mrsbear21 on Jul 1, 2022 22:49:50 GMT
Just a quick update to say introductions are still going well. Much easier now we're both off work.
Paddington came to the house for the first time on Wednesday. That seemed to go well. Quite over-excited/overwhelmed at times; but he was there most of the day so impossible for him not to be. Apparently there's been no major behaviours afterwards. He is asking FC quite a lot of questions. He's quite anxious to know where he's going to be going to school. Obviously it is a safe space for him. So important to find a balance between giving the reassurance, but not allowing it to be a way to avoid building an attachment with us. But so far nothing unexpected has cropped up. I keep reminding myself it's very early days and, if we get this right, difficult times will come.
Tonight we had our first bath and bed routine session. Again quite excited to have story time with us, so the bath was quite splashy. But he did settle and go to sleep thereafter. FC is lovely and made us curry for dinner afterwards, hence the extra late finish.
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Post by leo on Jul 2, 2022 19:34:32 GMT
That all sounds as if things are going well and as if Paddington is coping as well as possible. Well done.
How are the two of you managing? It's a long haul!
It will be so good for you to have the summer holiday time to get to know each other a little better before school re starts. (Is a school organised?)
Keep going!
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Post by moo on Jul 3, 2022 9:59:14 GMT
Wonderful news Mrs B Sounding fab...
Yep so close to end of school year.... a great feeling of newness always happens each september so a perfect time for goodbyes moving forward towards September.... giving you a wonderful summer to bond & grow as a family xx
Congratulations it sounds like the perfect start xxx
How long till move in day??
Xx moo 🐮
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Post by mrsbear21 on Jul 3, 2022 16:00:09 GMT
Thanks guys. First over night is planned for 12 July with official placement day 15 July. They are taking things very slowly because of last year's disruption. To SWs credit it seems to be working for Paddington.
School place should be confirmed this coming week hopefully.
We're doing well. We have the great benefit of doing intros from home. So while the 40mins drive is an extra thi g to tire us, we have the home advantage when we get there.
Today was drive to his house and do his morning/wake up rout8ne with him and then a second visit to our house. We took him on our own to our nearest play park when we got here and had lunch with him and FC. All very good and steady again. We also watched Paddington with Paddington after lunch! Turns out it is a favourite cartoon. 😁
Only flash point was not really wanting to leave. Hoping FC (who really is lovely) doesn't suffer too much as a result. Tomorrow is a rest day and we will be taking full advantage!
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Post by moo on Jul 4, 2022 6:26:20 GMT
WoW Mrs B know so well not wanting to leave, baa was exactly the same, traumatic & got worse each day, move in day was such a relief.....
I found the travelling the most exhausting it was about an hour..... ( no co driver!).... totally wiped me out....
School for us breaks up for skweek on 15th so great timing for summer hols & bonding time xxx
Xx You sound tired but happy xxxx
Congratulations Lovin' the updates xxx
Xx moo 🐮
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Post by leo on Jul 13, 2022 20:17:28 GMT
Hope things are still going well, must be getting near moving in day.
Good luck, enjoy if you can (or alternatively just look forward to him finally being asleep like I did!)
Look after yourself!
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Post by mrsbear21 on Jul 14, 2022 16:06:06 GMT
Thanks Leo! Moving day was Tuesday. So far, not too bad. He is an excellent sleeper so we know we're very lucky there. And of course there is still time for that to deteriorate as reality sinks in. He's very attached to foster mum.
Late afternoons are when we get the boundary pushing, sometimes tears and asking us where his sisters are. But we know we'll be seeing them at our house once before his birthday, and then also for his birthday party (he's an August birthday). So we answer the questions about where they are factually, look at the pictures of them, and his book from their adoptive parents and then discuss their visits. That seems to be ok for him for now. We know he's trying very hard to be "good" with us. Super keen to please, so as the trust develops we hope he'll want to speak about the topics that worry him more and how they make him feel. (But that's likely weeks/months down the line).
In the interim we've had lots of splashing in the paddling pool, various board games, tons of duplo and various park and soft play trips. The majority of the time is very good albeit exhausting going at the speed of a 5 year old always 😁
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Post by moo on Jul 14, 2022 17:43:16 GMT
Wow Congratulations.....
A Family Of Bears Altogether.... Fab News xxx
Enjoy The Honeymoon Period, Be Armed With Reading Up In The Archive Signs & Behaviours That Often Signal Boundary Pushing Is About To Start!?
I Love Your Updates You Sound So Happy xxx Enjoy These Very Special First Steps Together As A Family xxx The Most Wonderful Amazing Times xx
Xx moo 🐮
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Post by serrakunda on Jul 14, 2022 17:45:20 GMT
it seems to be going well, such early days but you are all doing fab
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Post by leo on Jul 14, 2022 19:40:15 GMT
Congratulations!
I remember well that late afternoon 'witching hour'. Sounds like you are handling it well.
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Post by sivier on Jul 18, 2022 10:42:25 GMT
Hope you had a good first weekend together and that Paddington is still sleeping well, and eating well too. I remember those first days at home so vividly - it was very much day by day - in fact hour by hour! Our AD was 17 months so the mornings were EARLY. It's exhilarating but also very tiring - take very good care of yourselves. xx
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