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Post by aprilshowers on Sept 29, 2015 7:34:03 GMT
Middly called yesterday....not heard from her in a while, she owes us money, she started college and is already in trouble (6 days) so we knew she would not be in touch as she needs to do stuff herself and the shame of not having the money to pay us back...we never really expected it but she insisted that it was a loan. So phone call is for........the news that she is pregnant, it has been confirmed by a doctor and is about 4 to 5 weeks, I calmly speak with her, tell her it is very early days and she needs to look after herself stop smoking stop the drugs, and to come round so we can talk properly as she will have to tell her SW and it is likely that where she is living at the moment...supported accomodation may not be appropriate. So waiting for her to get in touch about what time she will be here...if she comes, I am off sick at mo with breathig probs and a nasty cough have seen doc no infection etc but I feel it is stress related...still so much going on...and none of mine live with me. She is still with boyfriend, he is at this time supporting her, he is a nice lad, he works and is a calming influence on her, but I feel she is nowhere near ready for this or even to attempt it, but again what will be will be and we will be there for them.
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Post by caledonia on Sept 29, 2015 8:03:25 GMT
no words of wisdom, just gentle hugs.
cale X
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Post by pluto on Sept 29, 2015 8:54:58 GMT
Fingers crossed, hope for the best outcome. Soon reality will hit...... Take care of yourself, try not to worry too much.
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Post by serrakunda on Sept 29, 2015 11:41:47 GMT
(((April)))
not the best news, but at least she is talking to you
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Post by bop on Sept 29, 2015 14:08:50 GMT
((hugs))
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Post by mayan on Sept 29, 2015 15:17:27 GMT
Just gentle hugs for you and your dh - much love and much strength for what yet lies ahead. Thinking of you and hoping your health improves despite this latest.
Look after yourselves Mxx
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Post by corkwing on Sept 30, 2015 9:01:49 GMT
Hugs from me, too.
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Post by fruitcake on Sept 30, 2015 14:49:58 GMT
"We will be there for them ..."
Yes you will because you are a great Mum and they are lucky to have you.
That is good news about the young father: let's hope they can make a go of things with your support.
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Post by damson on Sept 30, 2015 19:52:20 GMT
Oh dear. (((April and DH)))
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Post by shadow on Sept 30, 2015 20:16:53 GMT
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Post by mooster on Oct 1, 2015 6:58:51 GMT
Sadly we too are on this path, the advanced guard by four or five weeks.
I seem so laid back by it that I am worrying myself while DH is the polar opposite.
AD is so young and she has no idea what is going to be asked of her at all.
Sending gentle hugs.
Mooster x
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Post by esty on Oct 1, 2015 7:01:06 GMT
Hugs to you and Mooster.
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Post by aprilshowers on Oct 1, 2015 9:42:06 GMT
Thanks shadow...just what the doctor ordered...lol
hugs moo, I too am strangely calm about this news.
Well the upshot is that she came, we spoke, she agreed that it will be hard and that she is selfish and will have to learn to put bubba first, she is keeping bubba no way would she consider anything else. BF is supporting so is his family, she was supposed to come back to ours after her college interview with her SW so we could sort out her GP and get her food shopping and do some washing for her...but she was no show, we heard from her late/early hours of morning she was at hospital with stomach pains and could we put some money on her account as she was hugry, they have told her that she is closer to 10 weeks and arranged for a scan today...she has gone public on facebook so the world knows. Still not sure what happend at meeting or even if she turned up but we will deal with one thing at a time. Now feeling dread its all happening so fast.
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Post by peartree on Oct 2, 2015 16:42:36 GMT
Just never ends does it. On the plus side she's found out relatively early on and shared it with you, which is good. But it is stressful. It's frightening as you know how unready they are, but you are where you are. I do think talking through things with hubby where your limits / boundaries are surrounding the baby and your dd is a good thing. Mr pt and I have done some work on the 'trauma triangle' This is where you've got 3 roles. Persecutor Victim Rescuer The idea is to try and interrupt the role you naturally lean towards and try and step out of the trauma triangle. We are right with you and mr grumps xx
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