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Post by flossie on Mar 20, 2015 11:50:55 GMT
Dd is due to go to school this September, she is still LAC at moment due to her needs not being identified whilst in fc. We are therefore waiting for an appropriate post adoption support plan! we have chosen and applied for the school we think will be best for her, however the VSH at placing authority doesn't agree... they are playing the 'shared parental responsibility card... who has the ultimate say, as far as I was aware that's me?! we've had a rough couple of yrs since she was placed, I've been unable to return to work, life has been turned upside down BUT I have done my best, jumped through all the hoops, attended the meetings, therapy, training etc and this is our family! so cross......
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Post by pluto on Mar 20, 2015 12:11:35 GMT
If she is not officially adopted you are not the one with the last say. I was in a similar position as you and on the end just went with what they wanted, than moved away. Far, lol.
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Post by flossie on Mar 20, 2015 13:27:24 GMT
Love your work Pluto! I think the moon might just be far enough....
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HELP!!!
Mar 20, 2015 18:56:17 GMT
via mobile
Post by leo on Mar 20, 2015 18:56:17 GMT
I was in a very similar situation to you and sadly had to go with the LA choice as I think they held 51% parental responsibility. I did manage to get them to change their minds after a year or so but it was very hard despite much evidence that it wasn't working. Good luck.
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HELP!!!
Mar 20, 2015 19:58:28 GMT
via mobile
Post by flossie on Mar 20, 2015 19:58:28 GMT
That's interesting Leo, our parental responsibility document says choice of school is ours... We'd be post AO if they could do their jobs properly!
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Post by lankelly on Mar 25, 2015 23:18:07 GMT
Do they say why their choice is best...seems a crazy system as you are caring for, transporting, supporting and liaising with school . Perhaps you can ask for explicit reasons for their choice if you don't know? Personally I'd ask the head of your chosen school to write letter of support saying how they'll help your child. Best of luck sounds grim control freaky behaviours.
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Post by corkwing on Mar 26, 2015 9:18:00 GMT
Hi, Flossie -
Well if the document says that choice of school is yours, you have it in black and white.
I'm not saying, "Just ignore anything they say". I'm sure you have listened and taken it into account, but as the document says, it's your decision.
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Post by flossie on Mar 26, 2015 9:48:30 GMT
Thanks Lankelly and Corkwing. I'm off to our chosen school for a meeting this morning, a letter of support sounds like a good idea. I plan to discuss DDs 'needs' with them and discuss how they can help meet them as their inability to meet her needs seems to be the main argument here.. VS were also unhappy with ofsted result, something that is about to change in a positive way so that's less fuel to the fire in my eyes...
What makes me cross is that all this is going on behind our backs, there has been no direct communication with us HER PARENTS!!!
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Post by corkwing on Mar 26, 2015 14:13:26 GMT
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Post by twoplustwo on Mar 26, 2015 20:00:52 GMT
I was in this situation and I told the SW that, as I didn't agree that their choice of school could meet Min's needs, I couldn't in all conscience take him there. I said that I'd get him ready for school but that the SW would have to take him there each day. I said that they could take THEIR child to school each day. They caved in and he went to our choice of school.
In retrospect it was probably a risky move but we felt VERY strongly that the school was wrong for Min.
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Post by flossie on Mar 27, 2015 12:04:55 GMT
Apparently they do hold 51% of the parental responsibility... two plus two, dh particularly likes your strategy.....!
Both schools have the required ofsted grading for the virtual school and having spoken at length to our choice I strongly believe they are right for my daughter.
Will they listen to the person that looks after dd 24/7??? We will see!! Bring on the upcoming LAC review, where I will not be providing cake :-(
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Post by flossie on Apr 16, 2015 6:55:01 GMT
.....think we might of won (whispering very quietly)!! School offer made today, will accept quickly. VSH backed down after an exchange of multiple emails, has made it clear that she will support LO in future but does not approve of choice..... I'm sure there'll be an 'I told you so' at the first sign of trouble ;-)
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