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Moving
Mar 8, 2015 11:58:20 GMT
via mobile
Post by peartree on Mar 8, 2015 11:58:20 GMT
Hi We are going to put the house on the market Partridge is very rattled Any tips?
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Post by janpan on Mar 8, 2015 15:01:22 GMT
Ours were a lot younger when we moved and were very rattled too (and we told them way too early). We got them to help us with making a list for the type of house we wanted to move to and all the things that could be better. We arranged for one close family to come and visit us in our new house quite soon after we moved.
Also, we made sure that we didn't do any of the viewings and left that completely up to the Agent so that we weren't in any way personally involved with the sale so that we could 'de-personalise' the whole thing for them. We also suggested that it would be good because it was a house that we would all move to together, rather than a house that we had lived in and brought them home to. That may not be so relevant for Partridge, I don't know how long you've lived there. We also got the removers to pack for us
That move was one of the triggers for a lot of crisis behaviour, particularly from Bee. Stealing food mostly - other kids packed lunches etc. I shouldn't laugh, but one of the stories of our various crises comes from then, when the primary school Head was talking to Bee about stealing food from the others and Bee promptly stole, in front of her, her Curly Wurly off her desk. Luckily she saw the funny side.
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Post by lilyofthevalley on Mar 8, 2015 17:24:28 GMT
Oh janpan, that made me laugh and brought back memories. Many years ago I worked at a day centre for people with mental health problems. One of our attendees was a lovely elderly lady who suffered from dementia. She had previously been a headmistress and her husband who cared for her always made sure she was well turned out. Because of her dementia she was not able to participate much in the activities but we had to keep a close eye on her because she was a great escape artist. One day she escaped, wandered off, we reported her missing to the police and they contacted us when they found her. I went to collect her. She was sitting in a small interviewing room in the police station. On the table in front of her was a large heavy glass ashtray. (In those days smoking was allowed!) As I entered the room with the police officer this genteel and smart lady took the ashtray and put it into her large capacious handbag in front of us! It was actually quite funny.
Lily x
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Moving
Mar 8, 2015 17:43:55 GMT
via mobile
Post by peartree on Mar 8, 2015 17:43:55 GMT
We have lived here 10 yrs and all in all its been a warm loving home. It's certaibly the longest partridge has lived anywhere. We haven't told blossom anything yet
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Moving
Mar 8, 2015 20:02:13 GMT
Post by lemonade on Mar 8, 2015 20:02:13 GMT
Our AD's unfortunately had to endure 3 moves since being with us. Two were very long distance. The first was when they were 8 & 9 yrs and had only been with us 2 1/2 yrs. DH was made redundant and in those days [sounding old now] it was a case of ringing estate agents in new area every day to find out what was available. DH had already made the move into lodging to start new job, so he would go view property and give me feedback. I was left to pack up the house etc and only saw DH during weekends. In that move Fizz didn't want to move, but Bubbles was happy to. Quite a few years later sadly DH was made redundant again AD's were now 16 & 17 yrs, this time Fizz wanted to move and Bubbles didn't! We had to sell house as mortgage was so high and move temporarily into local rented property, while looked for new house in affordable area. At least this time with the internet was able to see what was available much more easily. To make life more complicated, when we did move Fizz was just about to take her GCSE's and Bubbles was in 6th form. So ended up travelling 3 hrs round trip for 6 months to take them to school every day, just so they could complete their education! I would drop them off at school and hang around libraries, garden centres etc waiting to bring them back at the end of school As you can imagine it was a very stressful time, especially as both girls due to age, the move, past traumas were at their worst behaviour. In my experience it can take up to a year to sell a property and complete, plus if you are buying and selling you can get into the chain breaking, so my advice is keep it all very low key. If you have an idea of where you want to move to, check out the area for things your family is interested/involved in, which helps a smoother transition if those things are in place. L xx
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Moving
Mar 8, 2015 20:10:13 GMT
Post by milly on Mar 8, 2015 20:10:13 GMT
We moved less than a mile up the road when dd1 was 10 and dd2 6. Dd1 was more affected than we anticipated and claimed to miss our old house for ages (even though there were lots of pluses about the new one). Dd2 took it in her stride. We didn't do anything special as it was a local move, beyond take the girls to see the house as soon as we had had our offer accepted and talk about it positively, but then I didn't realise how dd1 would feel. I suppose doing it now I might make a photo book of the old house as a souvenir for her - we do have photos but not for that purpose. Dd1 is very sentimental by the way, and sensitive to loss - at 14 she has only just reached the age of being able to get rid of toys, games, books etc that she no longer wants. Often they have to go in stages - move to another room first etc.
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Moving
Mar 8, 2015 21:47:36 GMT
Post by peartree on Mar 8, 2015 21:47:36 GMT
Partridge is strangely rattled as he's been mouthing off about moving out and leaving for a long while, ever since we found out he was "planning" to get his first pay packet and disappear. We've worked hard on things since then, that we will support him looking and he needs to make communication a priority (which he loathes). He's had a strop about not being important and who cares about him and his PoV anyway. But we have pointed out we are planning for him to move with us, at least in the short term. We've shown him the details of the place we are looking at and explained it would be a better space albeit smaller than where we are atm but a more useable space with parking and garage. Last week he refused to look. He's been with his gf all weekend (the toxic awful one) and is in a foul mood. His bedroom is a hell hole and Mr pt told him to clear it up please. He's had a stomp off. Good grief He's 19 - not 12 but honestly he's very snarly..... He's come in and has made a start on his room.... It's like having Kevin and Perry cleaning the car....! Pfff it's going to be a long few weeks.
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