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Post by shadow on Feb 10, 2015 20:13:45 GMT
I don't know really how to describe today
Yesterday I left home to go pick up my DD from her boyfriends family home arriving nearly nine hours later to arrive at almost midnight -we left and then only managed to find a bed to sleep in after a few hours of driving
we got back
She is coming only for a short time to pack her stuff from her unit and here and to say goodbye- and go to live so so far away
But we spoke today - it was an amazing 8 hours -talking about her childhood with me - she put on my songs of praise CD on which I used to play and sing along to when trying not to murder her - she talked about my parents taking her to Sunday School and how she loved it and the minister talked to the children - we talked more -I cried a few times
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Post by shadow on Feb 10, 2015 20:20:56 GMT
we drove up through Moffat where we have travelled many times - talked about the times we went through before - and went to see my old family home there - laughed at how when we visited the hillside cemetery and visited family graves she took flowers off other graves to put on her adopted families -who she never met
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Post by shadow on Feb 10, 2015 20:23:49 GMT
I wish I could describe what happened today - I think I saw and met the real shadette
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Post by mayan on Feb 10, 2015 20:51:05 GMT
I know there are so many "ifs and ands" aren't there always with our children .. But despite all the impossibilities you guys found each other and have connected and still do matter to each other in the most profound of ways - so glad you are still standing after everything you have both endured - to experience the view from behind the shutters and that I am fortunate enough to share in reading your post. Time too soon for letting go with trepidatious heart, such is the fate for all parents eventually but all the more poignant given your journey to today.
Sending much love and strength to you both and heartfelt wishes for the miles between you to be a short journey between two hearts.
Mxx
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Post by wibbley on Feb 10, 2015 20:55:38 GMT
Oh wow shadow, so much seems to have chsnged.
I hope its all for the better for you both.
Best wishes
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Post by doubletrouble on Feb 10, 2015 21:04:56 GMT
My goodness shadow. I certainly didn't expect to hear you say 'Boyfriend' and traveling so for with Shadette considering how things were not so very long ago. Bitter sweet for you, but how far she has come is just staggering considering the struggles you had together in the last few years. Hope this 'journey' for her will turn out well and that she realises that you have given her so much of yourself to get her there. Much love.
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Post by leo on Feb 10, 2015 21:18:53 GMT
Wow Shadow. What a change from a year ago - and so very bittersweet. I am so glad that you still have a relationship with her and that she loves you, knows you will be there for her and trusts in that relationship - who else would you be so cheeky with as to ask for a free taxi ride for that distance except your own Mum!
I hear the concern though - that she's still making dodgy decisions and uprooting herself from all that is secure and known. I hope she has the ability to be just as cheeky in asking for a ride 'home' if things don't work out for her.
Thinking of you.
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Post by mudlark on Feb 10, 2015 21:22:52 GMT
Your post brought tears to my eyes.
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Post by serrakunda on Feb 10, 2015 21:28:51 GMT
Shadow, I seem to have missed something, is she going to live with the boyfriend?
But she sounds like she is building a life for herself, and you are rebuilding yours
A new phase in your relationship, and it seems a positive one. And you will always be the mum mum
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Feb 10, 2015 22:09:12 GMT
Wow Shadow that is bittersweet.
How great that she has found the courage to go so far, but sad that it means leaving you behind.
You will always be her mum mum and how lovely that she could acknowledge this and all that you have done for her.
You gave her her wings to fly and lets hope she has the homing instinct and flies home to visit from time to time.
Shadettes journey is just beginning.
Empty nest syndrome is a bitter pill to swallow, but remember you always have us lot to talk to, we understand and we care.
Hugs to you xx
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Post by peartree on Feb 10, 2015 22:49:36 GMT
Shadow what a painful thing but you have a 'goodbye for now' and Thats rather beautiful
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enid
Bronze Member
Single Adopter
Posts: 75
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Post by enid on Feb 10, 2015 23:07:56 GMT
very sad time when your chick flies the nest. xxxxx
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Post by damson on Feb 11, 2015 6:52:59 GMT
May her new wings hold true and bring her back to you now and then. xxx D
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Post by corkwing on Feb 11, 2015 8:45:37 GMT
Sounds like an amazing memory for you to hold!
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Post by shadow on Feb 11, 2015 10:33:50 GMT
if anyone is interested - the prequel is on the ASB boards
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Post by janpan on Feb 19, 2015 10:40:35 GMT
I'm not a member of the ASB boards so I've missed this too. I've been aware of your journey with Shadette for many years and have often thought about what an amazing parent you are and how difficult and complex life is for her. So I just wanted to write to say how wonderful it is that she has finally been able to show herself to you and that the love you feel between you is there. How sad too that she has to leave to go so far away but I imagine it's the nature of our relationships. I hope she will come back to you.
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Post by homebird on Feb 19, 2015 10:53:57 GMT
Having followed you for many years I got chills reading this. I also don't have access to the ASB boards but would love to read the prequel to fill in the gaps. Shadette seems to have grown so much since we last heard from you.
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Post by moo on Feb 21, 2015 8:05:43 GMT
Oh wow shadow.... unbelievable update.... I am with ginger 101% you are an inspiration & shadette has the best of mummums.....
Many gentle hugs are sent to you xxxxx
Xx moo xx
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Post by caledonia on Feb 23, 2015 11:16:50 GMT
what a journey you have had Shadow.
what are the ASB boards?
Cale x
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redbush
New Member
Married Adopter
Posts: 37
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Post by redbush on Feb 24, 2015 8:01:55 GMT
inspiring xx
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