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Post by imp on Nov 9, 2014 13:07:59 GMT
I have just been looking at some photos that some super Adopters took of one of 'our' LOs during Intros.
Where is that lovely, cheeky smile we know so well?
Just reminded me that, although Intros went 'well' it really did have a massive impact on LO, even though they appeared to cope well.
It is said that the camera doesn't lie, and these photos support that statement.
I know that all will be well, LO will settle, but thank goodness I have passed on many photos with the 'real' child on, and trust that they will soon have some of them their selves
Hope my ramblings might be useful to you as you approach Intros x
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Post by poohbear on Nov 9, 2014 20:48:04 GMT
I thought our first picture together during intros was so lovely at the time. I now look back and see a stunned little lad that was merely tolerating us holding him.
He's so different in the album of pictures from his foster carers and in pictures moving onwards into his life here with us!
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Post by loadsofbubs on Nov 10, 2014 8:25:13 GMT
I look at photos of my AS from his first months and ditto, looks shell shocked.
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Post by serrakunda on Nov 10, 2014 10:16:58 GMT
I have a photo of Simba on day 4 of intros. He is sitting at the top of one of the those really big slides they have in soft play centres. He is clutching the teddy bear I gave him on day 1. He is staring into space, I remember him sitting up there for several minutes and having to go and call him down. I've always wondered what was going on in his little head at that moment.
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Post by chotimonkey on Nov 10, 2014 14:57:21 GMT
In our albums it takes about 3 months for ours to start laughing and playing with abandon... It's so confusing for pre/ barely verbal bubs... But they do get there...
It's been nearly a year since george came home and I was watching ours play at a story centre at the weekend... Three gorgeous children, completely absorbed and delighted by their play... V v different to just after George's placement when they where all completely unsettled and all over the place.
Must be do hard for FCs waiting to see the real fosling re-emerge
Xxx
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Post by nomoretears on Nov 11, 2014 14:21:44 GMT
Chotimonkey, sadly we don't always get to see the "real" child re-emerge. With quite a few of he children I've moved on those intro photos are the last I've seen of them  I get Christmas cards/updates for most of the children, but a picture can say so much more. |
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gertie1
New Member
Married Adopter
Posts: 19 
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Post by gertie1 on Nov 11, 2014 18:14:12 GMT
We have a "lovely" pic of our boy during intros. Smiley, happy and eating which he hadn't in the days before this. Now I look at that pic and see the sunken eyes full of worry and stress and ever so pale. Nothing like our pics a few months later.
Intros are so so tough for everyone but very easy to forget how traumatic it must be to children who can't verbalise what's happening or make sense of it.
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Post by poohbear on Nov 11, 2014 18:14:20 GMT
Shrimps foster carers are coming to his birthday party on Saturday and i hope they will see how happy and settled he is :-) They were a big part of his life and will never be forgotten!
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Post by chotimonkey on Nov 11, 2014 19:24:18 GMT
Sorry to hear that nmt... I just don't get adopters that have lovely FC and don't stay in touch... It's madness on all levels... Every time we see our FC we bring (prob too many) pics so we can share lo's day to day life, but also it's a nice way if helping Los start a conversation a
It's FC and get them used to the idea that life with FC and us are bridged together and not separate stories, but that we are all part of their continuous narrative.
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Post by lolapola on Nov 13, 2014 20:21:58 GMT
I have a photo from day one ... all three of us are smiling, but now look like rabbits in the head lights!
Talking of intros, I was chatting with my two as they were brushing their teeth tonight (there was more talking than brushing going on) and GR said "I like how the FC's house looks"
Me: What do you mean?
GR: I like how the outside looks in that photo (looking at our special people photo board)
Me: Do you remember the inside?
GR: No, Yes, No, not really
Me: Do you remember your bedroom
GR: Um ...
Me: Tomorrow, shall we watch the video we took of the house when we met?
GR & GLF: YES PLEASE!
It's only been 9 1/2 months and they are already both struggling to remember things like the FC's house (where they lived for 3 years).
If you are adopting older children (mine were 6 and 4 at placement), consider getting your child/ren to take you on a guided tour of FCs house, or there favourite places/ parks etc that you can video on your phone with a little running commentary. My boys have really benefitted from being able to watch these little clips to help them remember.
Just a thought, sorry to hi-jack the thread.
Lolapola x
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Post by imp on Nov 14, 2014 13:37:33 GMT
Lovely idea lolapola
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