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Post by pirate on Sept 24, 2013 19:33:39 GMT
Butterflies.......prep course tomorrow
will let you all know how it goes.
xxx
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Post by kstar on Sept 24, 2013 19:41:34 GMT
Good luck! It is really useful for the most part, mine was really draining though so put the wine in the fridge ready for when you get in :-)
The best thing to come out of it is connections, one of my best friends now is someone I met on prep!
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Post by vickyvixen on Sept 24, 2013 20:54:58 GMT
I loved my prep course - getting to know a few of the social workers (including the family finder) who were there every day was good. Even better was getting to meet other people going through the same process as me & who understand. It started to feel very real and that something exciting was happening! Good luck & let us know how it goes
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Post by pirate on Sept 25, 2013 20:18:15 GMT
Today I met lovely people on the prep course from different backgrounds like foster parents, birth parents like me, gay couple, older people all with one aim: to be parents of an adopted child.
Learning differences/expectations with adopted children and birth children.
Dipped in and out of conversations, be respectful towards others, and listen to ideas AND enjoy this journey!
Day 2 tomorrow.
Feel contented and happy.
I'm sure new friends have been met as well.
Pirate
Xxx
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Post by pirate on Sept 26, 2013 21:17:51 GMT
Another amazing day on the prep course.
Learning about loss - what does the child loose being adopted/what loss does the birth family go through. Loss issues.
Children with health issues.
So much I learnt about and able to take part in group discussion/smaller group discussion. Using my experience of being a birth parent.
Not everyone joined in, just sitting quietly.
We gad an adopted mum come in and discuss her experiences of adoption and a photo book of her and her hubby on what they liked doing and photos of their new bedrooms, individual rooms with description and a teddy bear visiting each room! So the siblings had been prepared for their forever home before leaving foster care.
And another book of the adopted children with the teddy bear in the rooms of the forever home, and with their first new clothes and pairs of shoes!
All these years later the adopted mum still takes her photo book around and talks to adoption courses.
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Post by spideress on Sept 28, 2013 22:06:29 GMT
I don't know if you did the "wall" on the "loss" thing on the course but I found that very helpful. The idea that some of the basic "bricks" a well looked after birth child takes for granted like "security" "food" "nurture" etc are either completely missing in many children who come up for adoption or at best very fragmented/damaged.
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Post by pirate on Sept 29, 2013 20:43:14 GMT
Hello Spideress
Yes! Covered the nurture, damaged child, security and loss yesterday.
Met a dad to two ac (siblings) shown his photo album of his home/garden/family pets/kids bedrooms - their adopted children saw them just before they were placed.
He explained about his personal experience with birth parents contact in a centre supervised, understanding behaviours/loss/communication.
Now I've done the prep course I feel better prepared with the next step of meeting the social worker and assessment process.
Pirate
X
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Post by peartree on Oct 4, 2013 10:23:24 GMT
Thanks for writing about it pirate That's really interesting Sounds like good prep You never stop learning with adoption things One thing I thought is that it would ultimately become a momentous but 'in the past' section of our lives It's still here daily for us. Not negatively (well sometimes hard times etc) But it never goes Adoption loss and trauma are daily things that just become part of life I didn't pick that up from my prep Along with several other things ! Well done pirate Rooting for you  |
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Post by swimchic on Oct 4, 2013 21:16:21 GMT
Hope that you are still enjoying it..
This time last year, we were doing our Prep course and I loved it. We also met a couple who have become really good friends.I kept thinking "oo maybe this time next year we will be matched". Little did we know!
We're 6 weeks in now and our gorgeous daughter is fast asleep upstairs as I write. Its the best thing we have ever done and she is an absolute star.
Good luck with everything!
Swimchic
xx
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Post by pirate on Oct 7, 2013 22:26:06 GMT
Hello Peartree,
Thank you Hun for all your guidence and support xxxx
Swimchich
Good news that you have a little one!
Good luck with your pink.......so pleased for you! X
With the lo it's a slow drip, course was a few weeks ago....waiting for social worker to be placed with us!
I get butterflies when I think of adoption and nerves and excitement.
Pirate
X
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Post by taliesin on Oct 30, 2013 10:39:39 GMT
I don't know if you did the "wall" on the "loss" thing on the course but I found that very helpful. The idea that some of the basic "bricks" a well looked after birth child takes for granted like "security" "food" "nurture" etc are either completely missing in many children who come up for adoption or at best very fragmented/damaged. I found that The Wall was the best way to explain it to family/friends......I'd talked about all these issues long enough with them, but it wasnt until they 'saw' it for themselves, that it really, really clicked for them......excellent tool to signpost them to |
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Post by moo on Oct 30, 2013 12:21:10 GMT
Agree with spideress & taliesin.....
It is very visual.... Used to be on the old auk site moving about with each missing brick..... Don't know if it is on bubble city tho.....
Xx. moo. Xx
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Post by scaredycats on Apr 16, 2014 9:04:03 GMT
Our Stage II 3-day training course was excellent but after the first one, which was about the children who come into care (we also did The Wall), I was absolutely exhausted and emotionally frazzled. (Thank goodness the course was run over a few weeks and not 3 days one after the other!) I cried a lot over the next day or so but Days 2 and 3 were more positive, although still with harrowing case studies to go through. The other prospective adopters on the course were great and we're all in email contact and I'm planning to meet up with several of them soon, so I'm looking forward to that. Most of them were male/female couples and there were 2 single female adopters there too. It was great to hear everyone's different situations and we also had an experienced FC who was now adopting, and her experience was invaluable. I did find the other couples to be much more positive than I was though and that made me a bit sad. DH and I are very cautious, having friends who have had a difficult time adopting and also having adopted and fostered cousins. Maybe I'm more of a realist?
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Post by gilreth on Apr 18, 2014 22:51:38 GMT
Scaredycats - both DH & I have been very cautious through adoption because of watching my sister & brother-in-law. We were probably more realistic than many on our course and also made a point of investigating potential issues. Basically I am a researcher at heart so I like to arm myself with knowledge I might need - whereas other adopters find some stuff really hard to listen to/read about etc. I go into with the attitude better to have the knowledge and never need it than be looking for it when a crisis hits. We have been blessed with a wonderful little boy who has given us little to worry about so far but we know that could all change. Hope for the best, be prepared for the worst is our attitude.
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Post by sooz on Apr 19, 2014 8:46:52 GMT
I'm with gilreth on being cautious. Also a researcher! Forewarned and all that.....
Thing is, I have a fantastic little lad, none of his issues were apparent when we adopted him, and I didn't necessarily dwell on what 'might' happen, but I knew what 'could' happen, if that makes sense.
Being cautious doesn't mean being negative, just realistic.....and you are xx
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Post by swimchic on Apr 21, 2014 9:46:50 GMT
There is no problem with being realistic and practical..
But we were surprised, Pink is actually in the top half of her class at school and has no medical issues..So sometimes it can be a nice surprise too.
Pink has been home eight months now and it has been bumpy, but we have weathered the storm and we wouldn't change it for the world. In fact as time goes on, she is more settled and is doing well.
Wishing everyone well.
Swimchic
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