For those who know me of old...

Lovely to hear from you again Corkwing. I'd wondered where you were and how your family was doing?

Good to hear you are still standing Corkwing but sad to hear about Mackerel. Hope you all get the support you need to stay connected in a positive way.

Look after yourself

All good wishes to you and the family.

Mx

Good to 'see' you corkwing.

Sorry to hear mackerel is finding life tough, must be painful for you too.

How are the rest of your brood, and how are YOU?

Hi Corkwing. Good to hear from you.
MMx

Good to see you find your way over here but sorry to hear Mackerel is still struggling.

Hi corkwing

Lovely to see you here. I used to enjoy reading your posts on 'the other side'. Sorry to hear about Mackerel.

As others say, there must be some kind of bitter gratification that SSs are having to recognise that he's quite complex.

I hope you and the rest of the family have been able to stay strong and are looking after yourselves.

So how am I doing?  Really well!  I saw a really good life coach for about a year and she helped me to look at things very differently and address things in my own life.  That's helped me to make a dramatic difference.  So much so that I'm considering changing careers and becoming a life coach myself.  Particularly as my company's decided to move abroad to get away from me so I'll be made redundant sometime this year.

Kermit is still struggling in many ways.  She finds it hard when she can't be there to love and support Mackerel.  So she's finding it tough at the moment.  Social Services, for reasons that seem good to them, have decided to move Mackerel to a children's home about 10 minutes walk from us, so it's extremely likely that he'll be turning up on our doorstep.  (Yes, we did point out the many problems that causes but were met with lots of sweet faces and blather about rules and firm boundaries).  She will find it very hard to turn him away, particularly if he's upset.

Fairy Basslet is quite down.  She hasn't developed her own personality and sense of self, which is hard for her.  We're trying to teach her to say "No", rather than "I don't mind".  It'll be a valuable life skill!

Sprat blew up quite spectacularly when Mackerel moved out and it's taken us a long time to try to get him back down again.  He has to a large extent, but also inhabits the space the Mackerel left.

The rest of the family are a mixture...

Hey Corkwing
So nice to see you here!

It sounds pretty full on with the children. Hope Mackerel will be ok in the Children's Home ... it's very tricky for you and Kermit to have him so close and to maybe have to turn him away - gosh that's hard, what were SS thinking?

Great that you've found a potential new direction career-wise, it sounds really interesting - good luck with that.

Sivier

So nice to read your news.  Your kindness and wise words defined the old boards for me and I was only wondering the other day where you were and how your children were doing.  As hard as it is not having Mackeral at home, I really hope you all continue to benefit from the distance although as others are saying a home 10 minutes away seems very ill thought out.  I think you will make a wonderful life coach - will you be offering us all a Friends and Family discount?! 

Great to hear from you but sorry life is so difficult at the moment. I love reading your view on life and adoption and would love you to be my life coach!

Hi, it's good to hear how you are all doing.

Very difficult for all of you with Mackerel and can understand why Kermit is struggling: as others have said, being 10 minutes away doesn't sound healthy or sensible for all concerned, including Mackerel: it's a bit like when parents split and live very close-by, it makes it much easier for them to play one off against the other.

Firm boundaries are easier to instill when there's at least a little bit of geographical distance.

I hope you're staying around and not passing through.

Hey Corkwing! Great timing! lol I haven't been around a lot lately as DS had to go to a specialist therapeutic school and couldn't come to our old home anymore, so we've been trcking around the country at weekends and hols for about a year now! Finally moving house, which will make things easier but in itself a nightmare! Wonder if DS's school coudl be a better solution than a childrens home for Mackerel? There are lots of other boys who go "home" to FC on their weekends out. Great place, caring staff,costs a packet for the LA! MAybe worth considering? Glad to see you here but sorry Kermit is struggling. Good luck with the career change; and with Mackerel. x